The end is nigh, so here's a list

I really like lists. I LOVE them. The controlling impulse in me loves to see a crisp sheet of paper studded with bullet points, ordering chaos into manageable pieces to work through. It's my most effective calming mechanism, the way I get through busy weeks and daunting assignments. Lists quell panic and make molehills out of mountains, and the act of writing them can be utterly relaxing. Seriously, it's a form of meditation for me. At this moment I have a list for my dissertation; for my long essay; for the week ahead; for the topics I need to revise; my shopping list; one for blog topics. Crossing things off is one of the most satisfying feelings in my day to day life - yes, really.

One night this week, before I went to sleep back in my lumpy single bed in uni halls, I made a list of all of the things I'm looking forward to once these exams are over. Looking back at it helps me through sticky moments of revision and dissertation redrafting - it also keeps getting a little longer every so often.

My Grand List of Exciting Things After Exams

getting fizzingly drunk on champagne with my friend as soon as her last exam's finished - at, er, midday

having hours and hours to write, without studying getting in the way

diving into a book for hours like I used to when I was twelve

finally getting my driving licence, after three attempts and four years not practising very much

blogging more (eight-hour studying days did delay this post!)

lie-ins - I plan to sleep all morning, the first chance I get

belly dancing at my final WSAF - the epic Warwick Student Arts Festival, for those not in the know

stewarding lots of the best shows at the Arts Centre, getting to see them for free, while all the other stewards are swamped with their own exams

graduation itself, which I've been looking forward to for approximately my whole life, and for the weekend of which my parents have rented a listed cottage (party on!)

securing a stellar grad job, of course

and finally, and perhaps most excitingly:

the Boyfriend and I escaping abroad days after I graduate for our first holiday together - after three and a half years, no less - to Dubrovnik in Croatia where we will walk through Kings Landing and Qarth and sail off to an island on a pirate galleon (yes, really).

So there you have it, a glimpse into my headspace as the end of days encroaches on the horizon (my undergraduate days, anyway). I feel dangerously calm right now, even though D-Day - deadline day, for my dissertation and my long essay - is a week tomorrow. I've written it all, and just in the process of editing. I may write a post on my dissertation itself, as handing it in will be the end of a long journey that began last year, in Canada. Rarely did the nine thousand words of an undergraduate have quite so much emotion invested in it. After I post this, I'm off to stock up on healthy food for the week and hunkering down for a session of revision and essay editing. Until next week, then.

My desk, redolent with lists among other useful ephemera (and Frank Turner setlist on the wall)